On Enduring Well

Week three of my month-long review of selected General Conference talks rests on the ample shoulders of President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency, and more specifically his words in Priesthood Session. His talk, entitled "Continue in Patience," in my mind is a seminal discourse that we all need to hear. He opened with what to me is a familiar experiment in social psychology:

"In the 1960s, a professor at Stanford University began a modest experiment testing the willpower of four-year-old children. He placed before them a large marshmallow and then told them they could eat it right away or, if they waited for 15 minutes, they could have two marshmallows.

"He then left the children alone and watched what happened behind a two-way mirror. Some of the children ate the marshmallow immediately; some could wait only a few minutes before giving in to temptation. Only 30 percent were able to wait.

"It was a mildly interesting experiment, and the professor moved on to other areas of research, for, in his own words, 'there are only so many things you can do with kids trying not to eat marshmallows.' But as time went on, he kept track of the children and began to notice an interesting correlation: the children who could not wait struggled later in life and had more behavioral problems, while those who waited tended to be more positive and better motivated, have higher grades and incomes, and have healthier relationships.

"What started as a simple experiment with children and marshmallows became a landmark study suggesting that the ability to wait—to be patient—was a key character trait that might predict later success in life."

Now, aside from advocating for longitudinal research designs, President Uchtdorf showed here a finding in the natural world that can easily be applied to our spiritual lives, being that those who are patient now can obtain greater blessings in the future. We live in a time of instant gratification, in which all things that we desire are at our fingertips. But as such, we have raised a generation that undervalues patience. Nevertheless, says President Uchtdorf, "without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect. Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace."

Patience isn't Merely Waiting

President Uchtdorf then gave a story about how as a little boy, now in postwar West Germany, he was made to learn English, a language his tongue just did not seem to grasp. He noticed, however, that with the support of a kind teacher, and with patient persistence, he was able to even learn English. He used this example to show that patience involves work--working toward the desired goal, acting and not being acted upon (see "Standing Water Ahead" April 11, 2010). He said:

"There is an important concept here: patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!

"Impatience, on the other hand, is a symptom of selfishness. It is a trait of the self-absorbed. It arises from the all-too-prevalent condition called 'center of the universe' syndrome, which leads people to believe that the world revolves around them and that all others are just supporting cast in the grand theater of mortality in which only they have the starring role."

The Lord's Way and Time

"The children of Israel waited 40 years in the wilderness before they could enter the promised land. Jacob waited 7 long years for Rachel. The Jews waited 70 years in Babylon before they could return to rebuild the temple. The Nephites waited for a sign of Christ’s birth, even knowing that if the sign did not come, they would perish. Joseph Smith’s trials in Liberty Jail caused even the prophet of God to wonder, 'How long?'

"In each case, Heavenly Father had a purpose in requiring that His children wait."

I think with this quote we reach an all-important principle: Heavenly Father will not take away our burdens when we want Him to do so. It is in the learning that we receive trials, and we will receive them until we learn what He would have us learn. The storms of life will inevitably cloud and dampen our spirits, but it is how we perceive those storms in which true, Godly patience is defined.

Patience Requires Faith

President Uchtdorf later emphasized that that mindset is forged in the faith that our trials are for our own good. It is realizing that God has control of our lives, and that we are to look forward to the blessings that will inevitably flow as we diligently seek the Lord's will, recognizing His hand in our lives. President Uchtdorf said,

"Often the deep valleys of our present will be understood only by looking back on them from the mountains of our future experience. Often we can’t see the Lord’s hand in our lives until long after trials have passed. Often the most difficult times of our lives are essential building blocks that form the foundation of our character and pave the way to future opportunity, understanding, and happiness."

How true this is! I personally, am ever grateful for the Lord's blessings that come after a long battle with my desire to be among the "entitlement generation." I recognize that oftentimes it is in the waiting from whence the blessing comes, as our faith is forged through experience and trial. Let us always remember to endure well, seeing that it is by the Lord that our trials are manifest; if we do this, I know we will be blessed, because such was expressed by President Uchtdorf, who I know to be a prophet of God.

Have a great week!

"Tell Me the Stories of Jesus"

Welcome to Round 2 of my General Conference review. Today I would like to turn my focus to the talk given by Elder Neil L. Andersen during the Sunday afternoon session. Being the last speaker before President Monson was to close the entire conference, Elder Andersen in jest mentioned he wondered which of his thoughts would already have been expressed before his turn. taking a more serious tone, he said that regardless, each speaker is inspired to speak on what they feel is right; this gave me a renewed faith that we should pay heed to the words of the conference speakers, as they truly were prepared with all of us in mind. If there are repeat messages, it is because we need to hear it more than once!

With that said, Elder Andersen's talk was still richly unique, focusing on teaching out children "the stories of Jesus." He sad that this was important because "in our world today, each child, each young man and young woman needs his or her own conversion to the truth. Each needs his or her own light, his or her own 'steadfast and immovable' faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, independent of parents, youth leaders, and supportive friends."

I agree with Elder Andersen when he said that telling the stories of Jesus brings faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, and I thought it profound the questions he then asked:

Are the life and teachings of Jesus Christ embedded in the minds and souls of our children? Do they think about the Savior’s life when they wonder what to do in their own lives?

...Have our children visualized the premortal council, where Jesus—the greatest of all—declared, “Here am I, send me”? Do they see their own willingness to serve as following His example?Do they think about His humble birth,the Savior of the world lying in a manger?

Do His circumstances help them better understand the proper place of material possessions?Do they know that Jesus often taught, “Ask, and ye shall receive”?

Do His prayers of thankfulness and His pleadings to His Father flow through our children’s minds as they kneel in prayer with their own concerns? Have we told them of the love Jesus has for children, how He held them in His arms, prayed for them, and wept?

Do our children know that Jesus stands ready “with open arms to receive [them]”?

Do they take strength in the stories of Jesus fasting—as we teach them the law of the fast?

...Have our children felt the power of the Savior’s miracles?

...Do our children believe that “it is by faith that miracles are wrought,” and do they pray for miracles in their own lives? Have our children taken courage from the Savior’s words to the ruler of the synagogue: “Be not afraid, only believe”?

Do our children know about His perfect life, His selfless ministry, His betrayal and cruel Crucifixion? Have we testified to them of the certainty of His Resurrection, of His visit to the Nephites in the Americas,of His appearance to the Prophet Joseph Smith in the Sacred Grove?

Do they anticipate His majestic return, when all will be made right and every knee will bow and every tongue confess that Jesus is the Christ?

Do our children say, “Tell me the stories of Jesus I love to hear”?

I love all these questions because they help us as parents and stewards to understand the standard of teaching that the Brethren expect, and in turn, what the Lord expects of us. If we are not seeing these outcomes in our children, how might we improve? Elder Andersen simply states,

To fathers and mothers, to grandfathers and grandmothers, and to those without children of their own who lovingly nurture children and youth, my counsel is to speak more frequently about Jesus Christ. In His holy name is great spiritual power. “There [is] no other name given nor any other way . . . whereby salvation can come unto the children of men, only in and through the name of Christ.”

It is my hope that we may all take this counsel to heart, and have more courage to talk about the Savior, our relationship to Him, and most salient, of the true and living stories of His life, ministry, and miracles. Let us not just here and empathize with these words; let us incorporate them into our lives, making a plan on how to do just a little more! Let us remember that "two men can do anything, as long as one of them is the Lord."

Have a great week!!

"Standing Water Ahead"

Happy Sunday to everyone! For the next four weeks, I would like to react to the words spoken at the 180th General Conference of the Church. I know that the talks given were inspired of God, that the messages shared were meant for our uplifting, edification, and (most of all) learning. I sustain the Brethren of the Church as prophets, seers, and revelators. This means that they receive revelation for me and for you, and they can see the calamities and hardships that have, do, and will beset the entire human race. This is a grand assertion; nevertheless it is true, and as such we must all study the words of the prophets again and again, that we may know how to better govern our lives and the lives of our families.

In that vein, I would like to start "Conference Month" with yet another bold talk by Elder David A. Bednar, entitled "Watching with All Perseverance." In it, Elder Bednar talked about warning signs of all kinds, and how spiritual warning signs should lead to increasingly vigilant watching. He then directed the rest of his thoughts toward the family, and how parents can keep their children vigilant and watchful. He offered three imperatives, which we will assess in greater detail:

1. Read and talk about the Book of Mormon with your children
2. Testify spontaneously about Gospel truths
3. Invite children to act and not be acted upon

Read and talk about the Book of Mormon. Elder Bednar said the following about the Book of Mormon:

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught that abiding by the precepts found in the Book of Mormon would help us “get nearer to God” than any other book (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Smith [2007], 64). Regular reading of and talking about the Book of Mormon invite the power to resist temptation and to produce feelings of love within our families. And discussions about the doctrines and principles in the Book of Mormon provide opportunities for parents to observe their children, to listen to them, to learn from them, and to teach them.

Youth of all ages, even infants, can and do respond to the distinctive spirit of the Book of Mormon. Children may not understand all of the words and stories, but they certainly can feel the “familiar spirit” described by Isaiah (Isaiah 29:4; see also 2 Nephi 26:16). And the questions a child asks, the observations a child shares, and the discussions that occur provide crucial spiritual early warning signals. Importantly, such conversations can help parents to discern what their children are learning, thinking, and feeling about the truths contained in this sacred volume of scripture, as well as the difficulties they may be facing.

I really like how Elder Bednar says that regularly talking about the Book of Mormon brings the Spirit to resist temptation. I know this is true, because I've seen it in my own life. What great blessings he promises of we do this simple thing! It is also a spirit to teach, and discern the needs of our family members.

Testify spontaneously of Gospel truths. This is quite possibly the component that I learned the most about. It flows seamlessly from the first component, and is something that occurs naturally in our homes. In fact, Elder Bednar told us that the less regimented that bearing testimony is, the greater power it has to edify all who hear it. I agree with this wholeheartedly, and would emphasize that this is also true for he or she who bears the testimony. Elder Bednar said that testimony need not begin with "I bear you my testimony that..."

Our witness can be declared as simply as “I know I was blessed with inspiration at work today” or “The truth in this scripture always has been a powerful source of direction for me.” Similar opportunities to bear testimony also can arise while traveling together in a car or bus or in a multitude of other settings. The reactions of children to such impromptu testimony bearing and their eagerness or reluctance to participate are potent sources of spiritual early warning signals.

I know this to be true as well. Testimony becomes more effective when it is organic, that is, when it is intended to fill a need that salient in the very moment in which the testimony is borne.

Invite children to act, and not be acted upon. One step further, inviting children to act should be a natural progression from components 1 and 2. It is inviting children to become Gospel learners, to fill their reservoir of faith until overflowing. In an age of calamity, this is ever more important as children and adolescents each day are faced with challenges of their faith, as seen in peer pressure and popular media. We live in an age when being proactive is not value-added; it is crucial. Elder Bednar said:

Are you and I helping our children become agents who act and seek learning by study and by faith, or have we trained our children to wait to be taught and acted upon? Are we as parents primarily giving our children the equivalent of spiritual fish to eat, or are we consistently helping them to act, to learn for themselves, and to stand steadfast and immovable? Are we helping our children become anxiously engaged in asking, seeking, and knocking? (See 3 Nephi 14:7.)

The spiritual understanding you and I have been blessed to receive, and which has been confirmed as true in our hearts, simply cannot be given to our children. The tuition of diligence and of learning by study and also by faith must be paid to obtain and personally “own” such knowledge. Only in this way can what is known in the mind also be felt in the heart. Only in this way can a child move beyond relying upon the spiritual knowledge and experiences of parents and adults and claim those blessings for himself or herself. Only in this way can our children be prepared spiritually for the challenges of mortality.

It is my prayer that we may be tuned in to the warning signs, that we may save ourselves, and have the Spirit that we may teach our children, as well as any one over whom we have stewardship. May we do this, that we may have "eyes that can see far off, and ears that will hear the sound of trumpets."

Have a great week!

On Becoming a Righteous Priesthood Holder, Husband, and Father Part III

On this Easter Sunday, I would like to put a culmination to my thoughts on how to magnify our calling as priesthood holders. It is evident that the priesthood blesses the life of he who holds it, but only as the holder uses the priesthood to look outward to bless others, both temporally and spiritually. It is evident that the priesthood has a critical place in the family, as a governing force that leads the most basic but most important social unit toward salvation. It is also evident that sisters have a critical role in upholding the priesthood, that they may become joint heirs. The system of the Lord involves man and woman working together to create an eternal bond, bolstered by the priesthood, between themselves and their family as a whole, creating a type of blessings and responsibilities to come. A Melchizedek Priesthood manual explained:

“In the perspective of the gospel, ‘leadership’ does not mean the right to dictate, command, and order. On the contrary, it means to guide, protect, point the way, set the example, make secure, inspire, and create a desire to sustain and follow. Literally, the husband is to lead the way” (The Savior, the Priesthood and You [Melchizedek Priesthood course of study, 1973–74], 172).

While the father is the leader in the home, “his wife is his most important companion, partner, and counselor” (Family Guidebook [1999], 2). A husband and wife must work together to strengthen their family and teach their children the principles of the gospel. By fulfilling her role as counselor to her husband, a woman can reinforce her husband’s position as head of the home and encourage greater family unity.

Yesterday, at the 180th General Conference of the Church, Julie B. Beck, the General Relief Society President said that "so much depends on the daughters of God." She explained that there has never been a greater need for strong families and homes, so important for the sisters and everyone to understand. She referenced this to our ability to qualify for the Spirit and respond to personal revelation, which she said was "the single greatest thing we can learn in this life."

In that same session President Boyd K. Packer gave a beautiful dissertation on the priesthood, and its relation to the family. He said that in the world we will never dominate by numbers, but we have the priesthood, which is the power to act in God's name. He said that it is crucial for the sisters to know what is expected of the brethren, for the priesthood "will not have the power it should have until its power is firmly fixed in the family."

Today is a day of rebirth. We set out plastic, candy-filled eggs as a symbol of a newness that embodies the season when the Savior was resurrected, providing us all the chance to live again in glory with Him and with Heavenly Father. In the spirit of rebirth, I invite all priesthood holders to gain a renewed perspective on their duties, and how their duties apply to service of the whole human race. I know that we are only truly happy when we use our authority to serve, by "persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; by kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile."

The Savior desires to enlarge our souls. Let us let Him do so. Let us truly love those around us, and truly reverence the priesthood and the responsibility that comes with it. Let us also reverence women, who complete the priesthood so perfectly as to grant us all the blessings that this life has to offer, if we are but willing to accept them. It is my hope that we all may remember this on this Easter Sunday.

Have a great week!